My World

July 9, 2005

He stands there across the room. Talking, laughing, carefree. Only across the room but so far from my reach.

I can feel my world spinning again. Everything disappears but him. All the present fades away and my heart tumbles quickly into the past.

He was so many things to me. He was the one I wanted to be with forever. But everything crashed down long ago and I can’t truly go back. I guess I just never knew it could feel this way. How can this feeling still be so overwhelming 5 years from the first time I experienced it? How did he escape me and how did I find myself in the arms of another?

I knew he was the one. Maybe I still know it and that’s why it hurts so much. It hurts that we are not together and never will be. It hurts that I love someone else… cause no one else will be like this one.

I feel tears welling in my eyes as he brushes past me, and I force myself into the past. The memories will never fade into time. The love will never disappear there. That boy is more of my world than he will ever know, and my heart cannot fully let him go.