Smile Through the Tears

May 2008

Exhausted. Blistered. Bleeding. Bruised

As low as the dust I'm lying in

I've stomped this spark out so many times

My legs have given out again

And in feeble, hopeless pain I scream

With empty, aching, restless thoughts

Echoing off the walls of my skull

I tear at my hair, scratch at my skin

But self-inflicted wounds cannot make me whole

Then stop. In silence. Listening

A desperate, lonely, saddened cry

Reaches my itching, bleeding ears

It's the beat of my own heart

The sound of its dreams. The sound of its fears.

Clutch at the air. Cry into the wind.

I'm confused, lost, giving up.

When then I hear a whisper faint

A sound of hope, as if from Heaven

Echoing peace inside of my brain

Lie still. Don't move. Waiting. Waiting.

Huge and heavy feathered wings

Surround me now, like answered prayers

I'm scarred but secure, and not going back

My eyes are not dry, but I smile through the tears

Alive now. And loved. In this safety I sing.